Reuniting Humanity With Their Divinity...It's Time
This feeling has been killing me for many years, since I was very young. I hate to know that I was born differently from others, and somewhat "cruel", for I know that I would never be able to experience the happiness that others may have... I know that I will surely be rejected by this world if I reveal my true self... I loath myself to death, and I actually have no desire to life any longer...
I share most of Starseed's traits that I've just learned, and yet I have no power to overcome this condition that has kept me suffering more years... I was born with a male physics, but I know that my soul is too feminine to live with such body... I don't think that I can stand to bear this condition too long... my soul have been too sick to keep denying this fact... please help me...
I know that I will never have a chance of being loved by someone that I love... and that's too mean for me... I always try to find ways of how to live alone without anyone, and end up in failures. No one may understand how I actually feel... it's so painful... Now, after years of struggles, I see myself to be worthless, and I don't think that I may have enough power to live on this planet accomplishing missions that were assigned to me... does it that mean a total life failure? i have come this far, and it's no good to leave in the midst of my task... but my soul is not tolerable enough to experience such pain every second... the pain of knowing that the person who I love will never reply, because I love the person of the same gender as mine, I have to fight myself, and will never be able to feel being secure for being protected by the person I love... I need some healing to my wounded soul....and need power to keep living, before I have to really leave this world for good...
I need some clues, for what actually I was born if I was destined to suffer all along?? can we live our life alone?? what I should do now??
We will never judge you on here no matter what....We are all brothers and sisters of the universe and are to here to help everyone in need. I know how hard it is to not be able to love whomever you want and have them not love you back...I have lived without love all my life and am still waiting...My true love is dead and is now my guide and I wih to be in his arms again one day. He died before I ever met him, when I was a baby. I bet you have your twin flame with you and do not even know it yet as it happened to me. Keep strong, dear brother...
Love and Light.
LOVE is all, is the key, you, me, each living being here and around the Universe is made of LOVE. LOVE can heal everything. Just feel it inside you, look for it deep inside you and you will find it.
You are loved and never alone... fears, doubts, ego, etc... make you feel that, but if you only live in love and light, if you only let place into your life love and light, you will notice that fear and more are not necessary.If you think and decide you will never be able to experience the happiness, that you will never be loved, etc. then you are telling to Universe you will not be able and your free will is respected. Instead, you can change your thoughts, feelings, transmute them for love and just let enter into your life LOVE and only LOVE, not pain, not fears, just let them go! If life insists in certain situation, instead to avoid it, just stop for a minute and think about it, analize the situation and that way you can contribute to heal the situation and heal yourself... you should learn to heal yourself, the work begins at home and it is up to you.
Do not give up, come now! you are here, decided coming here, you were brave. Face and overcome the obstacles! if you kill yourself, then you will have karma and the next incarnation can be worse.
Just laugh at life and enjoy, be happy, a wonderful future wait for us !! :)
Note that if something is not meant for you, what matters? this life is a game... and you have perfectly chosen what you need to learn. Just think about it. Dialogue with yourself.
Look at you in the mirror and smile yourself, look at you and be aware of how important you are, the sacred Soul you are inhabiting a physical body that is your sacred temple.
Look around yourself, tell me... what do you see? you are surrounded by wonders, you are a wonder, though perhaps you do not see it, it is all a wonder... and everything was created By God-dess to see you happy. :)
it's nice to know that there's someone who can understand this condition of mine... at least i feel somewhat relieved... thank you so much... I always try my best to hide my true feeling and emotion by always smiling, but noone actually understands that I suffer a lot inside. I don't know if I have twin flames right now, but I wonder if there are any signs or occurrences that can tell you of twin flame's coming?
Thank you very much for your kind words... it's not yet the time to give up! it's so blessing to be in the community that can understand you.. I think I have to increase the time of self-dialogue to understand thus convince that I'm not walking the wrong path
I am very glad :)
As said our sister Serena, nobody will judge you here, we are a great Family. You listen to your heart always, it will never lie you and will guide you always through the right track.
Stay strong, you can do it! ;) <3
I neither wanted to experience such condition nor to be a female, yet I cannot escape from this disgusting reality.... I may be out of reach of wisdom to understand why our souls wanted this experience of being a female in a male body, as you said? don't you think that this, on contrary, is actually tormenting our soul? I'd be gladly to be shared more with "rare gender experience" from other starseed fellows, so that I may find any clues to overcome this difficult situation that has been hunting me for years....
Hi and hey ,
I have this condition also . Being a female / feminine inside a male body . And yes I know all too much how painful it is to experience unrequited love . Especially when you love " straight " males but the only males who would respond to you are " gay " , and your heart only guides you to the men who love physical women ... And then of course it is a task to find a balance , and accept this physical male body which seems so weird . But our souls evidently wanted this experience I believe , of being a female in a male body . I have already met a few fellow Starseeds here too , who have this rare gender experience .
Much love to you , Sister ! ! ! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
Elijah, thank you so much... you hit the point, that this world is actually too atrocious to live in.. I'm glad to meet you here, that we shared the same pain... as you and I believe, we have some missions to accomplish on Earth (even though I still do not know what they are, but I just knew, despite my intense desire to leave this planet as soon as possible), so it's just not the right time to give up to such conditions... once again, thank you...I think I may come again to you to seek for advice...
LIke I said , that is what I believe .
Why do all these souls incarnate into countries where millions are starving and impoverished ? ? ? I could go on and on about atrocities of this world though . It is a horrible world . All I am saying is I know the pain of such a situation , and I hope it alleviates for you .
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3
Well I feel your energy attracts what you send out. What about the Love of Nature? What about the Love of your Spirit? What about shifting the focus to something else? People on Earth are free will and constantly changing. Don't judge yourself and others so harshly based on one perspective. Things change in an instant. Our Source loves us and even while we go through the dark nights, is there to give us bright days. What are your dreams? Live them, give them a chance.
The world is not horrible, look for the universal love in all things. If people make you feel it is horrible then hang out with nature and animals. There is more than one perspective here. Earth life is temporary, veiled and free willed. Don't get stuck in illusion. You are spiritual beings having a human experience. Get what you can here, do what you can here and you will go home. All will go home to the field of constant oneness and love. No worries and there never really have been worries.
Chris, thank you so much for your comments, it's sort of relief to hear this... I understand that I have to learn on tolerating such instant change, and gradually try to accept this condition.. when i reach this point, i believe, i might have been able to understand Love actually means...
I believe that one's mission corresponds to the nature of the nature of their incarnate.
You've been dealt a particular hand of cards. It's not about wishing that you were handed a different set of cards to win the game. It is about using your cards to their greatest advantage to see the game to the outcome that was meant to be.
None of us are superheroes. Sometimes we hear or feel the need to DO something drastic and important to save the planet, but I think it is all so much more simple than that. We should take out the word "mission" once in awhile in replace it with, "be an example."
I think everything you are, every emotion, and every experience you're having is your mission. Focus on this very instant of your life and carry it out to its fullest. Bleed that pain upon this reality because your pain is the pain of this reality needed for it to evolve.
We're moving away from a purely physical and material based world and into a more spiritually based world. In the old world, love and partnership was heavily defined by polarization of gender energies. Males were to represent only masculine qualities as females were to represent only feminine qualities. We're coming into an age where all beings will be balanced in both regardless of physiology.
More and more people seem to be discovering that they've incarnated into the "wrong" gender. I can't agree with that. The only thing wrong is that culture has distorted our perceptions of what gender truly is. Gender shan't not be polarized. Little boys shan't just play with G.I. Joes whilst little girls only play with Barbies. Men, though representing masculine energies, should learn to be nurturing and empathetic. Women, though representing feminine energies via their physiology, should be tough and be able to fix shit. G. I. Joe needs to learn how to breast feed and Barbie needs a wrench.
You see yourself as having a "condition" or a "handicap." I see it as a gift. You're of a primitive generation of souls who shall overcome the stigmas, and taboos of gender boundaries when you realize how perfect and very well balanced you are and realize that the model for men and women for this time on this planet is an artifact of a civilization in decline.
Your experience is no different than those who may be purely straight. Not being able to find reciprocation in love is common for anyone. I, a straight male, with a male soul, inside of a male body have experienced this many times throughout my life. And every time, it has always been guided by the notion of wanting to die as it is that painful. I always thought it was because something was wrong with me. Maybe I was ugly? Sometimes I've been too young. Hell I was even told that I was the wrong gender by a girl I was in love who claimed to be a lesbian. Either way, I always placed that negativity upon myself. I just thought I was incapable of being loved. While all of my friends around me were constantly in and out of relationships. They found it so easy to attract and connect with others, while I was always alone. Unlovable. Untouchable. A maggot. A troll. The worst thing ever created in desperate need of being put out of its misery.
And at the moment I felt that all was lost someone fell in love with me. It was strange. Odd. The impossible became possible. I've been with that person ever since. But throughout all of that, I discovered that nothing was wrong with me and nothing was every wrong with me. There's nothing truly wrong with any of us. The problem is in the way the world has conditioned us. All love is conditional on this prison planet. We have height restrictions, weight restrictions, age restrictions, gender restrictions, race restrictions, and after all of those preliminary requirements have been met, we must sort out the applicants income level, interests, lifestyle, hobbies, living situation, travel time, all within 7 seconds to decide if we wanna fuck them or not. And at the end of all that we've decided not to because they didn't pass the height requirement.
We live in a world of bullshit man. Everyone is bullshit. Mind controlled zombies. We love whoever fits in with our goals and ambitions, and we won't touch someone based on what the people around us will think of us.
But it's all coming to an end. When people have to depend on each other to survive, they'll start to get it. We're all the same. We're all born with the same spectrum of emotion. We're all love and we all deserved to be loved.
Stick it out.